People often tell me I’m lucky because my husband does so much for and with my daughter. I don’t think I am lucky, and I just think my husband is being a parent.
My husband isn’t “helping” me when he participates in activities involving Riley, and it is what he is supposed to do. I often get asked, “wow, you are leaving your daughter at home with her dad the whole weekend”? My thoughts are yes, why not? He is her dad ya know! He is a parent too.
I think people forget that dads are parents because so many of them get bad reputations. I think it’s time we give dads some credit in parenting. There are many fathers that I know that are present in their children’s lives and do just as much as mothers do. I don’t consider my husband a back up parent at all. He is out here in the starting lineup changing diapers and cleaning up throw up just like me. I know society tends to view moms as the head when it comes to parenting but in my household that is not the case. I think that modern dads like my husband deserve respect because they are parents too!
My husband and I divide parenting responsibilities. It is a complete 50/50 split when it came to parenting our daughter. We both take turns with all of the annoying, gross, time consuming and beautiful things about parenting.
I think most of the stares my husband gets when he is out with our daughter and interacting with her is because society hasn’t entirely caught up to this changing reality that dads are parents too. Most think fathers are incapable of looking after children. There are certain stereotypes, especially those of African American men, that dads are not present or capable of doing anything concerning raising children. This is far from the truth! But time and time again most of them get portrayed as deadbeat dads who do nothing in their children’s lives. I find it sad because my husband is an excellent dad and doesn’t fit this stereotype at all, I find that most men don’t, it’s the bad apples that make it hard for the entire bunch.
But in the end, fathers are parents too, but they’re not mothers by any means, and we get it. I understand that I am very fortunate that my husband is present in my daughter’s life. Not all fathers can be so available in their children’s lives. Good fathers do what they can when they can. They are not Moms, but we’re not just bench warmers, either. So let’s give a round of applause for the fathers!