HEN HAIR & BEAUTY HEN MOM Lifestyle

4 Ways I Teach My Daughter To Love Her Natural Hair

Photo Credit Ali Stone of Those White Walls

My mother relaxed my hair at a very young age. When I found out I was having a girl, I knew that I would never do the same to her hair. Growing up I was not taught much about my natural hair at all. I honestly didn’t know that I could return my hair to its natural state.

Over the years, I have learned so much about how to care for my natural hair. Learning to love my natural hair though all the changes that I have experienced has been a journey. Being the mother of a daughter with curly hair, I can say that I am very excited to help teach her all about her natural hair. Here are a few ways I teach my daughter Riley to love her natural hair.

How I Teach My Daughter To Love Her Natural Hair

Reinforcing Her Beauty

Riley loves to watch me as I do my hair. When I do Riley’s hair, I always make sure to tell her how pretty her hair is and how much I love it just the way it is. She loves showing off her curly puff just like mommy and says “my hair is pretty like yours mommy.” Hearing her say this makes me feel so good because I want to set an example for her to love her hair no matter what.

Setting an Example

My daughter looks up to me, and I know that I have a major influence on her life. I make sure to stay positive around her and always tell her that is beautiful and that her hair is beautiful. If you externalize negativity in any way around children, your child will begin to absorb that energy. Remember to always speak positively around your kids, they are watching and listening to our every move.

Representation in Her Books & Toys

It brings me joy when I find books and toys that help to show and teach Riley that her curly hair is beautiful. Every time I run across a curly doll I buy it for her.

Kids sometimes associate beauty with their dolls and toys. If they don’t see girls like them represented they may start to think that their beauty does not matter. I love reading books with curly characters. I wrote an article on NaturallyCurly.com all about curly characters.

Involving Her In Wash Day

Allowing Riley to participate in her wash day makes it fun. It also helps her learn how to take care of her natural hair properly. Wash day does not have to be a dreaded time for your little one. Make it fun!

How to you teach your children to love their natural hair?

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  • Elizabeth
    March 6, 2017 at 5:48 pm

    Hey Michele, I think you’re doing a superb job with Riley. I love seeing you both together. You are both beautiful.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 6, 2017 at 9:55 pm

      Thank you Elizabeth! I appreciate you!

  • Porsche
    March 7, 2017 at 9:13 am

    Your daughter and her hair are beautiful!

    • Michelle Thames
      March 7, 2017 at 5:54 pm

      Thank You so much!

  • L.C. @ A Life of Authenticity
    March 8, 2017 at 1:19 pm

    I have the same experience; except I am going through the natural transition now. But it is primarily due to me realizing how amazing natural hair can be and that I can take care of natural hair. That is all attributable to my daughter (4). I would not have considered going natural before simply out of fear of the unknown (there’s still a bit of that, but I’ll get over it). I totally agree with you on all the things you are doing to make sure your daughter accepts the beauty that comes with her natural hair. I’m right there with you.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 8, 2017 at 11:21 pm

      Our natural hair is so amazing!! You are doing amazing!

  • Jay Colby
    March 8, 2017 at 5:06 pm

    This was a great article as a community we need more people to appreciate all aspects of our culture.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 8, 2017 at 11:20 pm

      Thank you so much!

  • Alaya Scott
    March 8, 2017 at 6:51 pm

    I so wish my mother did this for me when I was growing up, I begged for a perm and she gave it to me at a young age. I started going natural at 16 because of my aunt! I love my mother’s hair she has dreads and I’m natural, and I hope one day I can be a role model like you are to your daughter.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 8, 2017 at 11:19 pm

      I wish my mom would have done the same for me as well. I think now we are more educated today and that helps 🙂

  • CARISSA
    March 8, 2017 at 9:07 pm

    Love these ideas…I too never want to relax my daughter’s hair, she loves our different styles and her curls I just hope it stays that way as she get older! Good Job Mama!

  • CARISSA
    March 8, 2017 at 9:07 pm

    Love these ideas…I too never want to relax my daughter’s hair, she loves our different styles and her curls I just hope it stays that way as she get older! Good Job Mama!!

    • Michelle Thames
      March 8, 2017 at 11:18 pm

      Thank you!! I am so glad your daughter loves her hair!!

  • Marsha
    March 9, 2017 at 8:18 am

    Your daughter is so adorable and her hair is gorgeous! Kudos to you for instilling those positive teachings!

  • Aaronica Cole
    March 9, 2017 at 8:59 am

    Riley is such a cutie!

    Mini went through a phase of only wanting “flat” hair like Elsa and her friends. At first I was taken aback because her curls are so beautiful! What was big for us was making sure that she loved the way her hair was styled and and showing her beautiful women and kids embracing their natural hair! Now she runs around screaming “I LOVE MY NATURALLY CURLY HAIR!”–except when it’s time to comb it ha!

    • Michelle Thames
      March 9, 2017 at 5:44 pm

      That Elsa is such an influence LOL! I’m so glad she loves her hair. I agree though, once we get that comb it’s a different story LMAO!

  • carlana charles
    March 9, 2017 at 9:19 am

    I remember my first relaxer was at 10, now am a full grown adult and i am back to being natural, i keep it short but natural and i love it even more than the perms. It’s great you have started teaching your daughter such and important value at her age, more moms(parents) should follow your steps and not just with hair.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 9, 2017 at 5:42 pm

      Thank you! Yes, we definitely don’t just stop at hair. I just wrote another piece on speaking life into your children today 🙂

  • Felecia Monique
    March 9, 2017 at 1:01 pm

    Gosh I wish I had a daughter to teach her the importance of valuing your beauty. Such a beautiful peace.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 9, 2017 at 5:41 pm

      Thank you so much!! xo

  • Elle (CleverlyChanging)
    March 9, 2017 at 8:06 pm

    You have so many gorgeous pictures with your daughters. As a mom to two daughters I definitely try to be honest with them as much as possible. I don’t want them to have a unrealistic view of adulthood. It looks like you are doing a great job with your daughter.

  • Kiwi
    March 10, 2017 at 7:22 am

    I love Riley! I think this is such an important post. Many of us got relaxers because curls werent in style and also there were no products on the market to keep up with natural hair. I went natural in 2005 not for style but for health. I know when I have kids I will not be putting any chemicals in my child (if I have a daughter) hair for health reasons alone. Also I am seeing so many moms follow suit like you to build hair confidence at a young and their hair will be longer and healthier without it being harmed by a relaxer. Great post Michelle!

    • Michelle Thames
      March 12, 2017 at 3:32 pm

      Aww thanks Kiwi!

  • LaShawn
    March 11, 2017 at 6:04 am

    I love these photos of your and your daughter. It’s so important to teach girls to love their hair no matter what state it is in. I always say our hair is so versatile, embrace it!

    • Michelle Thames
      March 12, 2017 at 3:32 pm

      Thank you!

  • Tiffany H.
    March 12, 2017 at 3:10 am

    My mom permed my hair at a young age, back in the day it wasn’t about natural hair! Now i think this generation is embracing natural hair. Glad you are teaching your daughter to embrace her hair, which will boost her self confidence and never feel less than because her hair may be different from others.

    • Michelle Thames
      March 12, 2017 at 3:32 pm

      Thank you so much!

  • Joanna
    March 14, 2017 at 12:51 pm

    These are great tips! I definitely agree with setting an example. My sister recently went natural after her daughter begged her to straighten it so much. Now she loves her curly hair.

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